The Lover

There was an emptiness inside, and a dark cloud had come over my life. A woman who I deeply cared for had left me for someone else. I was alone and could not foresee a time when the loneliness would end. That’s when Connie came into my life.

I lived in a townhouse, and the guy who lived across the driveway had moved out a few weeks earlier. There is always anticipation when a new neighbor is going to move in. The landlord had shown the place to a few people, but he seemed frustrated by the prospects. I was just hoping for someone who wouldn’t cause too much trouble.

One afternoon, I came home from work to see some vehicles in the drive and boxes sitting around the outside. Being in a darkened mood, I left them to their work and went inside. For the next several days, there was activity, but I never saw the new neighbors. Then, I walked out of my backdoor to find a girl sitting on her patio. I say girl because we were young and because she had this look of innocence about her.

I spoke to her but got into my car without much of a conversation, and this turned into a pattern. Sometimes, she would be sitting alone. Other times, a guy would be sitting with her. The only constant was that I would speak and jump in my car. Then, there came the day when she said something like, “You don’t talk much do you?”

I walked over and said something that must have been dumb, but she invited me to sit, anyway. We talked for a while and talking on her patio became a regular thing. We learned a lot about what brought us to this patio and found that we were both wounded souls. She had married young to escape her mom. The marriage didn’t last but gave her a cute little boy. The guy that hung around was her boyfriend, but she was sure about that.

I told her about the situation that I found myself in. I was heartbroken for the first time but, as I know now, not for the last time. We also talked about the stuff that we liked to do, and I finally got up the nerve to ask her out. Of course, she had a boyfriend, but we could go out as friends.

As time passed, we became closer, and the boyfriend came around less often. When I asked about him, she would avoid the question. One day, I asked the questioned, and she didn’t avoid it. She told me that they had broken up, and she wanted to celebrate.

That night, we went out, and it was like all of the other times. We talked. We laughed. The laughing part was the best. Connie put all of herself into her smile. It was the biggest and brightest smile I have ever seen. It lit up the room and lit up my life.

Everything was the same until we got back to the patio and sat looking at the stars. I don’t remember what we were talking about or what was going on in the world around me. However, I remember leaning over and kissing her. It was the sweetest kiss I have ever experienced. We kissed for a long while before going inside.

We made our way to the couch and ventured into a realm that I can’t describe. We didn’t have sex. We didn’t fuck. We made love. As I looked into her eyes and slowly moved inside of her, I knew that I was in love. I knew that I always would be.

There is no photograph in this post, and there is no detailed description of what we did. It was too special for that. I loved Connie, and I still do. Unfortunately, I learned that it doesn’t always take someone else to break your heart. You can break your own, as well.

I let Connie get away and marry someone else. I think about her quite a bit and wonder how she is. I also wonder if she remembers that night the way I do.


10 Responses to “The Lover”

  1. Butterfly Joy Says:

  2. Ethan I like this post… So romantic. It’s nice to see this side of you. Thank you for sharing this.
    I wonder if she does as well.

  3. […] remember that it was snowing. Connie, her best friend Jennifer and I were hanging out at a local bar. It was early in our relationship, […]

  4. This is a reality check on the impermanence of beauty and love. I think we crest and fall in life and that is the way it is. We are only lucky if we can appreciate those times when they happen.

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